Today I want to discuss how to get a girlfriend if you’re socially awkward. Shying away from public situations and not being able to walk over to a strange woman is not uncommon, so don’t feel alone. But there comes a time when a man just has to pull himself together and either face the problem head on, or find some comfortable alternatives.
Despite all the things that have changed between men and women in the modern world, the dating game is still very primal. If you’re socially awkward, here are a few tips that can help you get the girlfriend you want.
Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone
You can either force it or fake it, but something has to give when it comes to your self-confidence. When you are shy or socially awkward, you automatically avoid situations that put you in a position to meet women. Unfortunately, those are the exact situations you need to be involved with if you want to get a girlfriend.
No matter how awkward it feels, you need to get out of your comfort zone and force interaction with women. Start small at first if you have to. Simply try making eye contact and saying “Hi” when you walk by a woman at the store. Then, slowly build from there.
Don’t have any preconceived expectations for the encounters. Just force yourself to do it. The more you practice, the easier it becomes.
Women are attracted to confident men. If you aren’t naturally confident, then fake it until you develop true confidence. By “fake it”, I mean force yourself to act confident even if you don’t feel confident inside.
Avoid Women Who Intimidate You…At First
Try to avoid women who intimidate you until you get more comfortable interacting with women. Otherwise, they will only make you more nervous.
What do I mean by this? If you find yourself feeling even more socially awkward around beautiful women who you are physically attracted to, then avoid these women at first.
Start by approaching and hanging out with women you view as “just friends”. Developing your confidence and communication skills without the added pressure of sexual attraction will help you take small, progressive steps instead of trying to jump into the deep end all at once.
Change Your Internal Dialogue
Changing your internal dialogue is one of the best things you can do if you’re socially awkward and want to get a girlfriend. Start paying attention to the thoughts that run through your mind the moment you see a woman. Are they positive or negative?
Have you already decided that she won’t want to talk to you before you’ve even said hello? Do you tell yourself things like:
- I bet she thinks I’m a dork.
- She probably thinks I’m ugly.
- She’s way out of my league.
This type of negative thinking can be a big reason why you’re socially awkward in the first place. It’s hard to be comfortable around a woman if you’re constantly putting yourself down and having negative thoughts about yourself.
Remember, it’s all in YOUR head, and it’s highly unlikely that she’s thinking any of those things about you. After all, she hasn’t even met you yet and doesn’t know a thing about you. Don’t let your own internal thoughts destroy your chances of getting a girlfriend.
As a final thought, if the large crowds at bars and clubs make you nervous, then think about joining or volunteering for community projects or taking classes of some sort. For example, a yoga, art, or cooking class.
When you’re socially awkward, these types of settings won’t seem so overwhelming. They give you a better opportunity to interact with a woman one-on-one without having to make a typical “approach” like you would at a bar, and you’ll already have something in common to talk about.
Getting a girlfriend when you’re socially awkward requires embracing your quirks and being true to yourself. You might need to approach things a little differently than other men, but being socially awkward certainly doesn’t mean you’re destined to live a life of loneliness.
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